Fire Bug!

I can't even believe I'm about to tell you this story...

When I was 6 years old, my Grandma Jessie had gotten new living room furniture and new carpeting. Naturally, because it was new she put 1970's-style slip covers over this beautiful furniture....fringed at the bottom and everything! It was NICE!

So one day, 6 year old me was home watching tv alone in the living room, mindlessly playing with the fringe along the bottom of the slip cover, when I noticed that some of the fringes were connected together. For some reason this bothered me A LOT. Luckily there was a box of matches sitting on the end table and I got a brilliant idea!! If I ran a match through the fringe, it would separate and everything would be alright in the world! So I did it. AND IT WORKED!! Naturally I ran a match through a few more fringes to separate those too. Man, that was fun. 

Of course, I quickly got bored with that game and and went into the kitchen to get some water. And when I came back into the living room the entire side of my grandmother's armchair was ON FIRE!!! 

PANIC!

I ran into the kitchen and turned the faucet on full blast and stuck my cup underneath the tap. When I pulled the cup back from the tap, it was nearly empty!! That was my first lesson in aquatic thermodynamics or physics or whatever! Because fast running water doesn't fill up a small cup at all!!

PANIC!

I screamed and my Uncle Louie came running down the stairs, flipped over the chair to put out the fire, which also happened to burn the new carpet at the same time. Did I mention I was in a state of 

PANIC!

Thank the Lord above, tragedy was averted. Uncle Louie saved my little life and apparently neither my grandparents or my parents killed me because I am here to tell the tale. I have no idea how I survived. I don't even think I got a whoopin' or anything, or maybe my poor little brain chooses not to remember it. I did get a new nickname, as everyone called me Fire Bug for the longest time after. 

That tiny flame on the end of that small matchstick taught me a valuable lesson about the power of fire. What starts out as a small spark can become a raging inferno in just a matter of seconds. 

Recently a dear friend of my mine had an awesome life altering tried-and-true-you-won't-believe-what-just-happened-to-me experience with Jesus and the Holy Spirit. It's not my story to tell, but trust me, it is an amazing awe-inspiring testimony.

And in the sharing of the story with me, I found myself overwhelmed with joy and overflowing with tears. 

I want to back up just a minute because a week or so ago I prayed to God about a lack of passion I was feeling. I acknowledged that I knew I wasn't on my game as far as how I study, pray, worship etc. I wanted to feel that excited drive to get to know Him as I once had. I felt as though I had once been a beautiful, vibrant and colorful tree, but had just dried up into a piece of old timber.

So as my friend is sharing with me, something was ignited and I begin to minister, to relate my experiences, to give scriptural references that would help bring clarity to the situation. And by sharing and talking for hours and hours and hours, a flame was struck in my spirit. 

A spark of Holy Ghost fire brushed up again my raggedy old dried up timber spirit and it erupted in raging fire.  I was reminded of what was already deep down inside of me; reminded of the truth that existed within.

We agreed to pray and read and study together. To feed this hunger to get to know Him together. Each one's flame feeding the other person fire. Together. 

What an amazing experience about the power of God to use anyone and anything to give us what we ask for, when we seek Him Only. 

The challenge is to keep the fire burning, like the priests of old who were commanded "The fire must be kept burning on the altar continuously; it must not go out." Leviticus 6:13

I pray that you find yourself near a spark of Holy Spirit and that you ignite your passion, your purpose and your hunger for Him all over again. 

In love,
Mona 

Time Heals

Time Heals All Wounds.

I can't count how many times I have spoken that phrase to people over the course of my life. The words rolled off my tongue with such ease when I was trying to help someone get over something or through a situation. 4 words that are so simple to say when the "time" and "healing" is for someone else.  I don't even think I knew what the words meant. It's just something I heard someone say and I adopted it for myself to spread around. 

"Don't worry, time heals all wounds"

That is until I was wounded, and someone said those 4 words to me.

*Hearing* the words, when you are suffering your own hurt, pain, brokenness, anguish or devastation is an entirely different ballgame. Who are you to tell me what time will do for me? Don't you know how deep these wounds are? 

My husband abandoned me.

My child died.

I lost my job.

I was molested. 

My wife cheated on me. 

My husband beat me. 

The bank foreclosed on my house. 

I have no food and no money.

You. Have. No. Idea. What. I'm. Going. Through. 

It's almost offensive to hear when you're in the midst of what feels like the end of all that you know. When your world has been turned upside down and inside out. When you struggle to find a reason to get out of bed. When all that you held dear slips away. I don't want to hear your empty phrase about time healing. 

But the truth of the matter is that time *does* heal. Except, it's not just the passage of time that heals, but what you DO with and during that time. 

If you sit in your living room in the dark for 2 years, a whole lot of time will have passed, but none of your wounds will be properly healed. You will sit and stew on your problems for 24 months. In fact, you'll create a few more physical and emotional wounds by doing it that way. 

So what are you doing in your "time"?

Are you seeking God for healing? 
 “Nevertheless, I will bring health and healing to it; I will heal my people and will let them enjoy abundant peace and security" Jeremiah 33:6 

Are you praying for the ability to forgive those that hurt you? 

"Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.” Mark 11:24-25

Are you reading your bible to find out what He has to say about healing?

Are you starting a blog or a journal to explore your feelings and to get them out of your system and onto paper or the internet? 

Are you listening to music that can uplift you and edify you during your times of sorrow?

Are you surrounding yourself with people who can speak life to you? Who can speak God's Word into your life?  

"The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing." Proverbs 12:18

Are you in therapy or starting medication?

Are you finding ways to stay active and staying in a circle of friends?

What you DO in your "time" is what facilitates healing. 

It's not an easy journey to healing. Journeys never are. But relentless focus on being better, doing better, feeling better is what matters. Even on the days when you can't. Every action forward is a piece of healing and the passage of time. 

Yes time heals all wounds. But it takes time, persistence, faith, hope, love, friends and prayers. 

I pray you are on your road to healing. 

In love, 

Mona

 




 
 

Worry Wart

I am a worrier. I worry about everything, big and small. I am always planning for the worst case scenario in every situation I find myself in. It's just who I am. It's how I was made. 

Worrying and this Christian walk don't mesh though. 

I've had folks tell me that by worrying, I am saying I don't have faith in God. Of course I have faith. I know that ultimately God is going to work it out. That doesn't stop me from worrying about how He's going to do it and when He's going to do it and who is He going to use to do it. So I guess I have worrisome faith. Just being honest.

Of the pretty severe life trials that I am going through right now I have been taking my worry to a whole 'nother level. I've at Peak Level Worry. DefCon 1 Level Worry. 

I think I'm hiding my worry, but my nearest and dearest know that I worry. They see it hidden behind that "Everything Is Okay" Smile that I have perfected. 

Know who else has seen my worry? God. He actually called me out about it on Sunday through my pastor. 

SN: Funny how God works like that with me. Just when I think He isn't paying any attention He goes and shows out in front of the whole church!!

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?

“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith?  So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:25-34

And my pastor specifically talked to me about my worrying later in the service. Creepy right?

The following day I was in such a state. So many things going wrong both at home and at work and I had to remind myself about this scripture. I read it online and put a printed copy on my desk to read every single day. As a reminder.

A reminder that no matter how crazy and upside down and topsy turvy my life is, I still know that God has a purpose and a plan for my life. I know that NOTHING and NO ONE can stop what God has put in motion for me.  So what's to worry about? 

Even if I lost everything, I understand, like Job, that God is in the mix. If a door closes, a window will open.  And if He does nothing else for me from this day forward, He has already done plenty. He saved me. 

So I'm not going to worry.

Much. 

In love,
Mona