The Spiritual Me Chronicles: Kitchen Sink Praying

I began to wonder how I came to be the Spiritual Me that I am today. Who and what were the influences that helped to create me? How did I get here? I'm going to take a few posts to explore my influences. 

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My grandma Jessie was my first memory of Spiritual influence. Not only did she teach me the 23rd Psalm. But she also taught me the Lord's Prayer from Matthew 6

Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread.  And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen

But she did more than teach me to memorize the words, she modeled what prayer should look like.

I cannot count how many times I would come upon my grandma speaking in this kind of loud whisper, like she was talking to herself. She'd do it while she was standing at the kitchen sink washing dishes. She did it when she was standing over the stove cooking. She did it when she was hanging clothes out on the line. She did it everywhere and all the time. I remember as a very little girl asking, "who are you talking to Grandma?" and she'd say, "I'm talking to the Lord." 

She talked to God all of the time. All. of. the. time. Hear me when I say. It became such a normal thing for my childhood, to try and catch what grandma was saying to God. Of course I thought it was funny was I was little, watching my grandma talk to herself. I don't think I ever did make out what she was saying! 

And truly, looking back, it didn't matter what she said. What she was teaching me was that her relationship with God was not limited to Sunday mornings, or Wednesday night prayer meetings. Prayer wasn't reserved for kneeling by your bedside at night. Prayer was for all the time and in every circumstance and situation.

She took everything to God. She stayed before the Lord about her 5 children and her grandchildren, her husband, her family, her bills, her needs and wants. She wasn't shy about talking to Him anywhere and everywhere. And in doing that she showed me that God was *always* there, ever present and ever listening.

Imagine the power of learning from the beginning of your life that God's presence was near. That He was so accessible that all you had to do was open your mouth and talk. It didn't have to be from the pulpit. Your prayers are just as effective at the kitchen sink as they are at the altar.

When I think back on it, it was such a blessed thing to have experienced. To see how God used Jessie to set me up for becoming my Spiritual self. Because of course it didn't take long for me to find myself doing the very same thing when I got older. It was instinctual to do it. To pray in the car, or the shower, or at work or lying in bed or doing the laundry.

I hope Jessie knows how big of an impact she had on my when I was just a tiny little thing. Her teaching me not only the words to say but the fearlessness in saying them whenever and wherever.

Nothing fancy, no big words and demonstrations, just talking to God.

Thanks Grandma!

In love,
Mona

The Spiritual Me Chronicles: Grandma Jessie

I began to wonder how I came to be the Spiritual Me that I am today. Who and what were the influences that helped to create me? How did I get here? I'm going to take a few posts to explore my influences. 

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My first true biblical memory was my grandmother, Jessie Ray, teaching me the 23rd Psalm. I don't even remember how old I was. Maybe 3 or 4, I guess. She kept reciting it to me over and over, verse by verse, until I had memorized every word. We did it night after night, in our nightgowns, nestled together in her twin bed, her reading from a little pocket-sized bible, for I don't know how long.

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.

He maketh me to lie down in green pastures;

He leadeth me beside the still waters.

He restoreth my soul;

He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies; 

Thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever. Amen

Funny thing is, to this very day, it's the first thing I think of when I'm afraid. It's my go-to scripture when things are topsy turvy or when I don't know what to do or where to go. I shout it when I'm riding on a scary roller coaster ride, or when I find out that a friend has died from cancer. It's what I say to calm myself when I wake up from a nightmare and when I don't know what else to say in times of trouble. 

It represents for me the presence of comfort. The warmth and comfort of grandma's lap. The memory of the top of her dresser, full of lipstick tubes, a brush, hair grease and lotion; a bottle of Timeless perfume by Avon and a round container of sweet powder with its white puff. The smell and feel of her makeup sponge that she wiped on her face. Her foam wig head. My Jessie.

I wonder why, of all of the chapters and verses in the bible, did she choose this one? Could she have known of its power to calm me? Surely she didn't know I would think of her every time I said it and that it would remind me of the simple times of childhood.

What was she trying to teach me?

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want 

He makes me

He leads me

He restores me

He comforts me 

He prepares for me

He anoints me

His goodness and mercy follows me 

It's reminds me of her comfort and ultimately teaches me about God's comfort.

 

I'm surprised how often I have to remind myself that God is in control. That He is at the end of my life looking backwards. The 23rd Psalm speaks to all that God does to bring me through. What an amazing first lesson. 

Jessie taught me so much more. We'll delve into it all bit by bit. 

In love,

Mona  

Watch Night

I went to church on New Year's Eve. A Watch Night service at Joint-Heirs Kingdom Ministries where my mom attends. Before that night I had been to a Sunday church service once in 2012 and not any time in 2011 (not including attending funerals). I don't even know what compelled me to go. And I was seriously compelled, from within. I said "I'm going to church tonight" even without wanting to say it. And I couldn't stop myself from going.

JHKM is a small but powerful ministry. It felt good to be there. I was a little nervous at first. I know no one expects God to strike you with lightning for not going to church, but you never want to chance it!! But the music was soul-stirring and uplifting. I let go soon enough and just hoped that I could find myself again.

The pastor, Darryl Carter, kept asking if anyone had a testimony. I almost stood up 5 times, but I resisted. I didn't want to be so cliche as to not go to church in 2 years and then cry my eyes out about it in front of strangers. So I kept my seat. The Word was great. People spoke about getting into position and getting ready for battle and moving forward. Everything I needed to hear. Everything I wanted to hear. 

At midnight we celebrated "making it over" and church kept right on. We kept trying to wrap it up, but you know it is when God is moving. I had a fantastic time. I felt at home. 

God spoke a Word to me that early morning. A word that was ominous but powerful. Not scary but necessary. He said some things thru Pastor Carter that could have only come from God, because this pastor doesn't know me from Adam. And I heard that Word. Every syllable. 

And after not feeling like God was speaking to me for such a long time, I was a sweet sound in my ear, in my heart and through my soul. 

Surprisingly, I went back the following Sunday. 

Who knows, this might just become a habit. 

Be blessed,
Mona